Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Cheesy hypocrites of Indiana

And so we're back to this: please don't offend my religious sensitivities. We're back to the bullshit nonsense of catering and bowing down to the fantasies and insecurities of religio-fetishists.

In France we told Muslims that offending them with depictions of their delusional prophet was something to be expected because, as a rule, religion and religious beliefs are not sacred and religious fetishists should stop pretending that their beliefs are some sort of beautiful virgin with a chastity lock with chain over her snatch while heterosexual men with raging boners be damned. I would say that religious beliefs are no where near close to a beautiful woman, virgin or otherwise. Beliefs are a matter of perception not reality.

With that we told these pesky Muslims to shut it. The freedom to offend the religious is something so special, even more valuable than a 5 piece chicken McNugget meal for 99 cents at McD's. It was worth the blood of arrogant chain-smoking French assholes who drew some very funny cartoons.

Yup, we all agreed: liberals, libertarians, and even the teabaggers of America of the conservative bowel movement.

I was a young pre-teen when I noticed something strange about people, particularly those who tend to have the asshole embedded in their DNA. It was the schizo-paradoxical super jerk-off hypocrisy of these people that baffled me at times. Locked in my tweeny memories we have an overgrown Baby Huey type older cousin of mine who hates cheese and cannot stand it. My mother would go out her way to make him enchiladas without cheese (how does that work? fuck should I know) just for Captain Special. And this would be the thing. "Ey Tia, No queso pleeeezze..."

I rolled my eyes every time he would do such a thing so much that it left me with a heavy persistent debilitating vertigo condition. You see once I caught the son of a bitch at the mall eating pizza with this girl he was boning and her friends. Pizza with cheese. Very cheesy it was. Since then I call him cheese-head.

And speaking of cheesy hypocrisy, what about those same schizos in Indiana who not long ago demanded that the right to offend religious beliefs in France but are now demanding that gays refrain from offending them with their awful requests for wedding cakes?

The moral of all this is what exactly?

Hypocrisy is indicative of a person who refuses to be an adult. And the other thing is that these teabaggers, whether Muslim or Christian or what-have-you, are not demanding "freeeeeedooooom" of religion. They are demanding that those of us grounded in reality and who do not suffer from their same fetish be disconnected from any sense of logic. Meaning if you seek honesty and consistency: you're not welcome in Indiana.

Fucking cheese-heads.